Over Thanksgiving we organized a Thanksgiving Outreach for YWAM Louisville--We had five teams go out on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday of Thanksgiving week doing lots of different things like serving meals to the homeless, distributing Bibles in a low-income area, and various service projects. My favorite time was Bible distribution because it was so great to be able to offer hope in the form of the Word of God to people. We were able to talk with one woman, Starr, who had been struggling with depression. We prayed with her and encouraged her with Scripture. She was so happy--she kept saying, "I'm so glad I opened my door!"

It was a busy but rewarding week :)

Last week our teaching was on Missions. God used it to remind me and emphasize to me that the next step after SOMD will involve some sort of preparation in developing a skill that I can bring into a country. The speaker emphasized having an "entry strategy" that will allow me to enter and stay in various countries. There are so many possibilities--education, business, health...lots of options. I need to seek the Lord and get some further guidance about which direction to step, but i am excited as I think about the work of proclaiming how great our God is to the nations :) Sometimes it seems like such an impossible task--to go to people who have never heard the Gospel and expect them to change everything they believe and follow Christ. But in these times the Spirit always reminds me of Christ's victory in the resurrection, the hope He has given us, and the power of the cross. God is so amazing. the Gospel is so amazing. truly good news. how quickly i forget these things if i take my eyes off of Christ Jesus even for a moment. The Gospel is powerful. Praise God His kingdom is not dependent upon my ability but on His Spirit and His finished victory! this is the message we carry to the nations--that God alone is worthy to be praised!

Last week we went to the southeast conference--all ten bases in the southeast gathered together for a week of worship together in talladega, alabama. There was a lot happening in each meeting and i think the main thing God was showing me was about how what God says is done--is done. That when God says, "It is finished" then it is truly and completely finished with nothing more to be done. when we repent of something and God says He is faithful and just to forgive--He is. When God says we are in Christ and our sin is no longer counted against us, it's true. When God says we are saints and beloved and that we are new creations--we are! It is so amazing the faithfulness and goodness of God.

God is also showing me a lot about grace. I think a lot of it started with Don Stephen's teaching on the Kingdom, which was the week before last. He talked about God's grace and how we are no longer under the law. period. Perhaps if this conference had been before that teaching i wouldve been there trying to do things to clean myself up. Instead, i was able to receive the truth that there is nothing for me to do, nothing that i have to do. I kept asking the Lord this week if there was something i should be doing and He kept saying no--He has done it all.

Amen!

Father Heart of God and Spiritual Gifts

This past week I was privileged to attend classes with the DTS on Father Heart of God as well as go to my own classes which were on spiritual giftings. It was a busy week :) I was in class basically all day every day with only an hour break for lunch. But it was good. I had the teaching Father Heart of God during my dts but it was our first week of teaching and the day before the teaching was kelly's accident so....i wasnt really into it.

One of the most impactful things was hearing the speaker, Doug Easterday, talk about his relationship with his children and his wife. He told stories about doing little, special things for them just because he knew they would like it. The way he talked about his love for his family helped me see God as a good father--caring for His children. God helped me see this week that i have not looked at Him as being a personal Father, but often a distant authority. Hearing Doug talk about his love for his kids helped me to see God's Father love for me. It helped me expand my view of God--He is big enough to be personally intimate with all His kids!

One thing that I have struggled with a lot in the past and this week has been reconciling God's sovereignty and our free will. It has been a struggle for a long time without conclusion. This week it was cool because Doug hadn't addressed the topic at all but for some reason Friday morning it was the first thing he talked about. He recommended a book on the topic and simply said that God is sovereign and we make choices. I'm not sure i will understand more than that. in fact, im pretty sure i will not. But it was really awesome how God brought it up and it allowed me to be more open to the teaching that day which was on forgiveness.

Our teaching this week was about God's calling on individual lives. Our speaker described discovering our calling like the putting together of a jigsaw puzzle--many times God shows you one piece at a time and as you walk it out the whole picture becomes clear. This week was great for me because God confirmed a lot that was in my heart already about going to India and reaching the unreached with the Gospel. God used this week to help me see that His vision is in my heart; I am excited to be preparing for it and living it.

God reminded me this week of His sovereignty. Every now and then I go through times when I dont want to move for fear of failure, but this week the Lord reminded me that He is sovereign. Our speaker said that basically we can expect to fail--but God is bigger than our failures. I can trust the Lord that He will guide and direct me. I can also trust that He will correct me. This is surprisingly comforting :)

It has been a full week at YWAM Louisville! This week our speaker was Donna MacGowan--who (with her husband, Mark) was my DTS Director at YWAM Denver. It was awesome having a teacher that I knew so well. The subject was Biblical Counseling. I loved it because it not only applies to helping us minister to others but it was incredibly helpful in the working out of my own salvation. God used the teaching to remind me and reveal to me again how He desires complete restoration in people. He is not simply satisfied with one being saved, but is interested in making them whole as well. The Lord was so good to me this week by showing me different things within me that He wants to heal and restore. God is so good.

We has the opportunity this week to "practice" doing ministry on each other--we got to share with each other about something we wanted prayer for and walk through the process of leading someone to the Lord and allowing Him to bring revelation and restoration in their lives. Through this exercise I realized how little I knew about counseling others. It was amazing though--to see how the Lord spoke to people and worked in the midst of my weakness. Once again--God is so good.

It was hard for me this week--I find myself being so reluctant to go through the process of restoration. I want it to just be done. But God is always so patient and gentle with me--never giving me more than I can handle. God is so good!

This week at YWAM Louisville we spent a lot of time learning about our personalities and what our natural strengths and tendencies are when interacting with people or completing a task. It was good for me to learn more about who I am and to think about how others are different and how we can walk in greater humility as we honor each other and consider our differences in personality.

God has been revealing Himself to me this week through His word and again through the study of missions in Pathways. He is revealing Himself as a God who desires the praise of the nations. I knew this before but it has been so good to see it revealed in the Scriptures systematically.

God has shown me a lot about myself this week--about fears that I am holding on to and areas where I am not trusting Him. He has gently put these things before me as He shows me more and more how He desires for me to be whole and fully trusting Him.

Early in the week God was revealing these things as He provided people around me to lift me up and support me. I woke up tuesday morning and felt light and joyful. I hadnt realized how heavy i had been. perhaps even from before I left india. God has been so gracious to me in providing such amazing friends that are praying for me.

Another week has gone by at YWAM Louisville...Last week we listened to a series of lectures about Effective Personal Ministry. It was a good teaching concentrating on the fact that ministry is service--meeting people's needs through the strength and power of the Holy Spirit. We also talked a lot about Paul's life and how he really lived out his teaching. It is actually kind of difficult for me to sit in class and learn about ministry. I want to be out in the world doing it; so it was somewhat of a struggle this week for me to engage during class. But God is faithful and always provides His grace even in small things like paying attention to lectures :) I am reminded often that this is a time of preparation and I want to make the most of it.

We also started a study on missions through a teaching called Pathways. It is a collection of articles on various topics but this week we read about how God from the very beginning has been a missional God. One that spoke to me particularly was from Let the Nations Be Glad by John Piper. Piper talks about how the purpose of missions is worship and that "missions exist because worship does not."

Piper says, "The ultimate foundation for our passion to see God glorified is his own passion to be glorified. God is central and supreme in His own affections...God is not an idolater...With all His heart and soul and strength and mind, He delights in the glory of His manifold perfections. the most passionate heart for God in all the universe is God's heart... Missions is the overflow of our delight in God because missions is the overflow of God's delight in being God...The gospel demand that flows from such a God to the nations is an eminently shareable, doable demand, mainly to rejoice and be glad in God."

This thought was a new thought for me--that God is by nature missional. He desires to share Himself. For us we start to see this at creation and it continues through His covenant with Abraham, David and ultimately through Christ.

God is showing me more and more that He has put His heart for the nations into my own. I am realizing how deeply I desire to be a part of God redeeming peoples from every tribe, tongue and nation to gather around His throne in worship. I already knew this a bit but the longing is deeper than i knew. i will go, but not yet...(and for the time being--let us bring His kingdom in America as it is in Heaven)

"Declare His glory among the nations, His marvelous works among all the peoples!" Psalm 96:3


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YWAM Louisville

Alright...blogging again. my extremely rare habit :)

Well lots has changed in the past couple weeks and now I am in Louisville, KY doing a School of Ministry Development with the YWAM here. It all came about really quickly just a few days before the school started--and the school started one week ago. So... through the school we are required to keep up with a journal each week and we can do it through blogging...thus--the reason for this blog and several to come.

Our teaching this week was on our passions/core values that we base our life on. It was definitely good for me to think about what my values are and how they came to be. The Lord showed me several things about myself and different motivations i have that need purifying in light of His glory and the fact that He alone is worthy of our devotion and praise. The teacher spoke many times about God's ultimate passion being the glory of His name and how we are to align ourselves with His passions. Through these teachings I was reminded again of the worthiness of God. He is passionate about His glory because He is God. He is all powerful, all mighty, always just, always faithful. He is love, mercy, grace. He is.

Through the teaching, times of prayer, and studying the word the Lord has shown me that many of my values come from a self-glorifying heart instead of a God-glorifying heart. He showed me that this will be a season in which i need to be diligent in walking through what He is bringing my way--no longer reluctant or unwilling. I pray I will continue in His grace to do these things.

One of the challenges this week has been transitioning to a new place and starting over yet again. The school I am in is unique in that everyone just completed a discipleship training school all together...except for me. It has been stretching this week to not allow myself to "hide". It is perhaps easiest for me to be alone--or with really close friends. It would be easy for me to not to much and stay out of the group but by His grace I think i did alright in trying to stay involved.

I leave you with this picture of a few of the kids I love in india. ive thought of them often this week and i miss them dearly!

to remember

I read Instrument of Thy Peace by Alan Paton while in Kathmandu last summer. It was beautiful. Here is some:

“Why did Jesus hold spellbound those who listened to him? It was because he showed them they were not helpless victims in the grip of fears, hates, the past, the world. They were the salt of the earth, the light of the world. He showed them a new thing—that obedience and freedom are inseparable. For where is the joy of living in a society in which all obey and none is free? Or in which all are free and none obeys? Something in them rose up to meet him; they were caught up into the bondage which is the perfect freedom; they became his servants and his freedmen; they became his followers and his disciples; in him they found meaning for their lives, and there is no freedom like the freedom of finding meaning for one’s life, of becoming the instrument of a Lord who helps us to be what we were meant to be.”

I am on my way to south carolina to live with some people who are indeed His followers and His disciples. In this next season of life i hope and pray that i will learn from them and step more fully into the life and the freedom of my Saviour.

hallelujah amen!